Acting Like an Asexual

I think it’s weird when people talk about “asexual behavior.” I have no idea what that phrase means. For that matter, I don’t really know what “sexual behavior” means either, since that can cover such a broad range of activities—even ones that are fairly harmless, like dancing, can be described as sexual. But it bothers [...]

Cosmetic Changes

Well, I think I’m pretty much settled with this layout now. It’s not exactly what I had envisioned—the underlined links bug the hell out of me, and if I could have it my way I’d change the colors of the links as well, but oh well. I’m not going to shell out $15 for just [...]

Playing With Blocks

That’s the title of one of my favorite songs—and no, this isn’t going to be one of those song posts (nothing against them, but personally that’s just not my bag). But it just reminded me of how I view relationships (prepare for extended metaphor, people). Building a relationship is like building a tower of blocks. [...]

What Does It Mean to Have a Sexual Identity?

For all its ancient, primal beginnings, sexual orientation is a relatively recent phenomenon. Perhaps “phenomenon” isn’t the right word. What I mean is, the concept of sexual orientation, as we understand it today, is relatively recent. The word “sex” was coined sometime in the sixteenth century, at which time the word was specific to male/female [...]

Virgins

A month or two ago, I remember reading a thread (or part of one anyway) on AVEN started by an asexual who is attracted to virgins. Several others piped up, saying that whenever they found out that someone wasn’t a virgin, they were immediately turned off by that person. One member in particular had an [...]

Testing things out.

As you may have noticed, I’m playing around with the site’s look a little bit. What I really wanted to do was create my own theme for the blog, but apparently I can do that and preview my changes, but in order for the changes to take effect, I’d need to shell out some money. [...]

Mixed vs. Uniform Relationships

According to this article, there is now some scientific evidence that same-sex couples tend to find it easier to relate to one another than do heterosexual couples. It makes sense. Heterosexual couples have long been plagued by gender inequality, as has the wider world. In fact, if I recall correctly, the ancient Greeks believed that [...]

Asexual Masturbation

I HATE that when I tell people I’m asexual, one of the very first things they ask me is whether I masturbate. Because first of all, hello, that’s kind of rude, isn’t it? It might be okay if you and I have been friends for a while, and you ask discreetly. But most of the time I’ve known these people for all of a few weeks, if that, and they ask right out in public. If I were doing visibility work, I’m sure I’d get asked all the time by reporters and talk show hosts. And I do think it’s a good question to ask, in order to educate people, which is why I’m talking about it here, but really? …

On The Development of My Sexual Identity

My little cousins recently came for a visit, and I find it kind of interesting to watch how they’re developing. One of them is a seven-year-old little girl, who is a little bit precocious for her age. She’s already reading books at least three or four grade levels above her own. One of her habits [...]

Sincerity

I have a hard time with sincerity. Not with being sincere, myself–that’s easy. More with determining whether other people are being sincere with me. This is especially difficult with straight men, because I am always aware in the back of my mind that they have an ulterior motive. For this reason, I’ve always been pretty [...]